Sastiest Sale

Being a part of cosmopolitans like Hyderabad and Bangalore for about 4 to 5 years I am very much used to the advertisements like

UPTO 50% OFF *

hanging around the city. The importance of such advertisements is not in the numbers "5","0(zero)" written boldly along with accentuating "O" followed by two "F"s. But it’s more important to see the obscure letters, written before and after these mammoths; small “UPTO” and a beautiful “*” followed by another statement at the bottom most part of the advertisement, saving the life of the advertiser, “Conditions Applied”. About 15 days back I saw an advertisement, where the advertiser was very much aware of the awareness of customers for these important “upto” and “*”. So, he added one smiley with the last statement. And it appeared something like this:

" Conditions Applied "

As if the advertiser wants to say, “ Dear customer, I know that you are intelligent and aware of the facts hidden behind the sentence Condition Applied, but I can’t stop fooling you!!! “
The 26th January sale of Big Bazaar came with all sorts of crazy things
The sale says something like this:
1) Rs. 25 for 1 kg of raddi (old newspapers)
2) Rs. 200 for 1 kg of fate hue kapde (tiered clothes)
3) Rs. 75 for 1 kg of tute hue bartan (broken utensils)
4) Rs. 15 for 1 kg of utri putrid bottles (used and old bottles)
5) Rs. 100 for 1 kg of fate hue jute (old shoes)
6) Rs. 75 for 1 kg of tuta hua ghar ka furniture ( broken furniture)
7) Rs. 50 for 1 kg of fate hue gaadi ke tyre
8) Rs. 20 for 1 kg of baaki ghar ka ataala (rest of the waste)

And yes, I will not forget to put a “*” after all this. As expected there has to be
“ Conditions Applied” in the end.